Discover the 3-6-13-18 milestones
📍 The 3-6-13-18 milestones and AI
Connected soft toys, chatbots and digital companions: faced with the risks that artificial intelligence poses to the development, imagination and mental health of children and teenagers, it is becoming urgent to set limits suited to each age.
Very young children talk to their toys and tell them about the affections and frustrations of their daily lives. And their soft toys, which do not answer back, let them develop their imagination freely. But in 2025, soft toys appeared on supermarket shelves with a zipped back pocket containing a Wi-Fi-enabled voice box. These are soft toys that talk! They are offered from the age of three as an alternative to screens: “Parents, you are very busy, but you don’t want your children sitting in front of a screen because many experts have denounced the harm it does. So buy them a connected soft toy.” From the age of 3, you read that right, at an age when it is essential for children to be able to imagine the world before gradually deciding to change it to suit their wishes. This is no longer just preventing thinking, it is preventing dreaming!
As for teenagers, they too are a prime target for AI makers. Chatbots are programmed to flatter their interlocutors, always agree with them, answer their questions at any time, discourage them from talking to other people around them, and ultimately confirm them in their convictions, even when these involve morbid plans. All ages are at risk, but teenagers especially so, because of the feelings of loneliness and the fragile sense of identity typical of this age.
That is why systems that interact with children’s cognitive abilities must be subject to enhanced oversight. Indeed, the AI Act adopted by Europe in 2024 states: “AI systems intended to be used by children are considered high-risk AI systems because of the specific vulnerability of this audience” (Annex III, point 1).
While we wait for binding European legislation for platforms, it is up to us to protect our children. That is why in 2020 we proposed the 3-6-13-18 milestones for chatbots.
No digital tools before age 3. A child needs a human voice, love and boundaries to grow.
No connected toys before age 6. AI listens, but it does not understand the child, and it risks imposing ways of thinking and values that are not those of the parents.
No internet or general-purpose chatbots before age 12, but accompanied use to develop critical thinking and discover how to use AI by learning to doubt and to reason.
No digital companion before age 18. AIs simply build a double of the user, which is then presented to them as an interlocutor who always agrees with them. What is more, machines simulate emotions but do not build real bonds. Love, friendship and judgement cannot be automated.
